Celibacy, Self Observation, sensation and Life

Celibacy could be viewed as a natural process of self purification. That “purification” means less “density.” When someone is “dense” we could observe that his emotional behavior, physical and mental ways are not in tune with each other. It is a if something is bothering us, but we do not know what it is, and we act in reaction mode all the time. We are completely unaware of the “energies” or “subtle vibrations” coming to us, depending on where we are and what has been going on there.

For instance, I recall that once I entered into a church partially destroyed by an earthquake. Many people “left their bodies” there. I felt the “energy,” “vibrations,” or whatever label we want to put into it. It was heavy and disturbing. I left the place right away. I did not know what happened there until I asked.

Similarly, we can charge a room in our house with certain “vibes” depending on what we are doing there.

Sexual practices could disturb our ability to self observe ourselves, because for most people nowadays, they are completely unaware that other “beings,” “energies” are using them. In fact, their practices will tend to deplete their vitality, which leaves them as a drunk person: Basically unaware. That is the value of celibacy as long as it is not repression masked as celibacy. Thus, through “natural” celibacy, there is one less thing to “worry about,” if we are serious about self knowledge. However, as I have mentioned many times, every one of us has a particular path to follow. Celibacy is not the “only way.”

Less “density” means that our distinct “bodies” (physical, ethereal, emotional, mental) become more acquainted with sound and light.

That is how sound and light can be used among other things, for healing purposes. A “normal” person may laugh at that. After all, he only believes in the power of pills (aka medicine) and its secondary effects; but less density means greater acquaintance with light, energies and vibrations.

Therefore, yogic practices and “new age” recipes have a purpose and that is to “de-densify” ( I made up a new word) the practitioner. That reminds me of the “kriyas,” “mantras,” “yantras,” and such practices. The Brahma Kumaris has such practices from diet to life style, as well.

Whenever our mind is in turmoil, sitting meditation becomes just a way to “watch tv,” that is we ARE our thoughts and we are participants of the story about the future, the past or the “problem” that just came up. Depending on the level of “purity” (lesser density) of the practitioner, awareness will appear and dispel the turmoil. Then, at that point when the mind is stable and we are able to watch it, so it stops “thinking;” at that point we could feel perhaps that natural bliss, elation or joy coming up. That is fulfilling in itself.

Part of the “purification” process entails to switch from the mind to feelings. When a “normal” person is engrossed in the mind then, the visual stimulus drives his life (usually in men) or the auditory stimulus (usually women) but the other senses could be there, except “feeling.” The feeling that I refer to, is not related with the sense of touch. More or less, is the sensation, could be called intuition. For instance, we meet someone and there is this “feeling” that I have met that person before, or there is some sort of attraction of repulsion. Those sensations are actually our best guides for our own lives rather than the popular “thinking, and decision making schemes.” Life is actually telling us what we have resolved or left unresolved and we are there at that time to take another look at it and act.

How disturbed do we feel? Is there passion? Attraction? Repulsion?The key is to know what that sensation brings in us. The mastery is in the way we deal with that.

Is my job more important? The way others think has greater influence? Shall I go all the way and forget about everything?

Decisions, decisions, decisions for some. No choice. Choice-less choice for another.

Welcome to Life 101! 🙂

Repression and fanaticism

A fanatic is a repressed individual. The degrees of manifestation of his/her intolerance for other views, represents the degree of repression.

I will use the example of sexuality to illustrate, but any type of repression will do. Someone who expresses dislike, antagonism or is heavily against something like sexuality, is manifesting his/her repression. How does it work?

Someone who is “made” by others or self-made to abstain from sexuality for any “reason” but yet that person is naturally sexual, is repressing his/her natural drive. Mentally “sex is good” will change into “sex is bad.” There will be an internal conflict whether it is somehow a bit conscious or completely unconscious. When that person convinces himself that “he must be celibate,” he will need to prove that for himself or others. Thus, he will express complete disapproval of any sexual behavior that he may see in others by mocking it, using derisive language, even expressing anger. That behavior will try to convince himself and others that “he is right” and the other person “wrong.” Actually, he is projecting his own “shadow” onto others.

If I am incapable of seeing my own sexual repression, it is safe to blame that feeling into another, so I become “blameless” in my psychological make up. It is “internal protection.”

However, that repression will build up just like any other repression; it could end up harming the individual with a disease or being expressed as a “binge” when sexual activity resumes.

It is relatively easy to pinpoint someone who is repressing sexuality. His face is tensed up. His character is tense an on the edge of explosion. There is no easiness in such person. As Life has it, if we reject an aspect of Life, that aspect will hammer on us as a “test.” It will be a continuous test even during sleep. That sort of fanaticism is truly dangerous for an individual well being.

On the other hand, there are individuals who could embrace a celibate life style without an issue. It is natural for them or even if a bit challenging, fanaticism will not be there. There is no repression.They will not get “worked up” if others talk about sexuality or observes sexual behavior in others.

There can also be philosophical fanaticism or political fanaticism. These are usually inventions of the divisive mind. Once we discover that the nature of the mind is to divide, then we could observe that any idea, dogma, morality or philosophy will have the tendency to divide and create conflict. It is unavoidable. Unity doesn’t come from the mind.

Therefore, any moral standard created by the use of rationality alone will be flawed, for it doesn’t consider the emotional aspect of human beings, their wholeness Repressing emotions is a way to create dysfunctional individuals in society. It creates inner conflict and neurosis. Also, when an individual follows an idea or philosophy, that individual forgets about his own unobserved nature to comply with an outside system. A philosophical system could be well-meant, to protect the individual but that is like riding a bicycle with training wheels. That individual may need to realize sometime, that he is not truly riding a bicycle. It is that difference of awareness between individuals the one making a “natural selection” according to their capacity to be aware. Systems are for those who want to feel safe in training wheels. The ones choosing to ride a “real” bicycle may have to experience hardship in Life (falling down) but they can get up and go on anywhere, with that exhilarating feeling labeled as freedom, which training wheels cannot give.

On sexuality, masturbation, pornography and celibacy

Human sexuality is a way to experience unity. Science will speak about procreation and pleasure, but that is not all. What science points out, is only what is common among “normal” men and women.

The interesting part is to look into what is “normal” now: A person who identifies himself with his body. A person who mostly is unaware of his emotional body and completely unaware of the make up of what he considers to be “me.” That person is mostly unaware of his own conditioning and uses the collective consciousness to complete his sense of “I.”

In short, an unaware individual is “normal.”

In a “normal” society then, my very first phrase above is completely unknown. Why? Because a man who is in unity within is not the “norm.” That unity means that his emotional body, his physical body, his mental body and etheric body are all in sync.

Most are not even aware that those “bodies” exist within but, many can agree that there is the mind, emotions and physical body. That is a good starting point. The “homework” is to become aware of what they “do” in us.

Therefore, an unaware individual with all his limitations will perceive sex accordingly. Many will ask: “Where do I start?” The first emotion to observe in my experience, is violence. As humans incarnating at this time, we bring with us our ancestors DNA. It is all due to “cause and effect,” known as “karma.” In fact, many religions mostly emphasize individual karma, but are unaware of the ancestors, that is; there is a “reason” as to why we were born into a particular family and the influence it has upon every member of that clan. Accordingly, there is a particular experience a person needs to go through to evolve.

Therefore, the main emotion running from centuries ago without a doubt is violence. Not only the type of violence that a person can inflict upon another person, animals, plants and Nature but also self violence which can express itself in repression among other ways. Thus, for the “normal” person sex will have a shade of violence. That is how “kinky” started in its different ways.

Let us include into the mix, a typical person who lives mostly in the mind and believes that “sex is mental.” (last 2 articles were about the centers of perception) thus, pornography becomes the preferred outlet and many will profit out of that “kinky” behavior. Society through its “experts” will label that behavior as “healthy sex,” but to protect from lawsuits, a slogan like they did with tobacco at one point will be needed: “too much ‘spice’ can be hurtful to your health.” What is “too much” is open to discussion. That is the loophole. I believe we get the idea of how corrupted our society has become.

Another missing ingredient? Yes. A “normal” person is addicted to whatever brings him pleasure. That is how masturbation came into the picture. In the world of duality, if we pursue pleasure, sooner or later we will encounter pain. That is the “law” for one side of duality is complementary to the other. The middle is the path to be in tune with duality. It is acceptance of the experience as it arrives without trying to control it. It is not denying pleasure or pain, nor facilitating the mental pursuit of one side or the other.

Whereas society argues cynically about what is “good” or what is “bad,” (it satanizes masturbation first and another time will give it the thumbs up through his paid “experts,” according to who is financing the new “morality,”) that dishonest behavior, has no consequence whatsoever once we realize that the culprit is violence within. If there is a word defining what the world has gone through in recorded history, that is violence.

No wonder many religions and beliefs have subscribed to celibacy as a way to “protect” a believer from something which could be detrimental to the evolution of a “normal” person. However, something imposed from the outside as an unbreakable rule to follow will not be healthy for those who are not ready yet. That is the catch for religious movements dealing with masses of individuals. For them, it is a “one size fits all” deal. Moreover, celibacy is not the denial of sex but actually “going beyond it,” that is; there is no need to engage sexually for there is unity within in a “natural” way. That is exactly my first paragraph of the article. However, every individual is unique and his nature unique as well, that is why; there has been self realized individuals embracing sex and others embracing celibacy; whereas others happily ask which path is the truth, sex or celibacy? It becomes another mental debate and nothing else. These individuals are happy following ideas from “experts”, but unable to look inside yet.

The above is only based on my own experience. It is not the “truth,” or some other dogmatic label. Some may ask: What do I suggest then?

Observe that inner violence. Observe how violence is the way of our society. Observe how comparison, competition, getting ahead, and all of those “values” that society has promoted, will lead to violence in many ways. Observe how the mind engages and daydreams with something which is not “real,” tangible and that human sexuality is devalued to mere pleasure, when in reality it is way more than that, which is unknown for the majority. Even though pleasure could be gratifying, its continual pursue is empty and it will take the vitality away from men and the sensibility and emotional gift that a woman has to connect.

I am not promoting a rebellion against society. Going “against” is another way of violence. By realizing the “facts,” we live in the world but we are not part of it. That is all.

Lastly, heal yourself from that violence, as it becomes the other side of duality, that is compassion. From there, sexuality is viewed under a new perspective. As we know, that is how we change the world and society, by changing ourselves first.

Re-entering society after the BK experience

A friend living in Australia asked me to give some advice on transitioning to society after leaving the BK experience.

Many Bks have a hard time adjusting back to the ways of society. Re-entering becomes a problem which is in direct proportion on how “pukka” or “firm” the ex-follower was.

It is worth noting that society in general, is deeply ill at this time. Thus, to feel a problem in trying to adjust to such challenge is actually a good sign. As my friend Mathias once told me:”The positive aspect of living in a madhouse is to know that you are a doctor.” That sanity is maintained when a person has plenty of “Me-time,” that is the space of “nothing doing” to rest, contemplate and replenish. Rest, relaxation and contemplation is my favorite “go to” prescription.

It is important to acknowledge the BK teachings that resonated with your personality. For instance, if a vegetarian diet was something which came easy for you and thus, enjoyed good health; then it is wise to continue.

If on the other hand, there were repressions in you while in your BK days, then a “binge” in the opposite side may happen. For instance many embracing celibacy by repression while in the BK religion, will most likely become overly sexual after leaving the BK experience. The important aspect is to notice your own repressions to find out what is your true nature at that time and to accommodate your life style to the ways of society. Relationships may be a problem specially if there is emotional neediness or fear of becoming intimate again. Celibacy because of fear of sex is not celibacy at all. Fear of getting closer to someone could be labeled as “avoidance of body consciousness” when some neurosis or fear is the reality behind it. Those are the types of “check and balances” that someone willing to know themselves should consider.

The emotion of guilt is very popular for those who left the BK movement. This emotion is typically covered with anger and the rationalization that “ I was a victim and was cheated.” For others, that guilt becomes a sensation of being “less than,” that is a sense of failure and depending on how hard the BK belief/dogma stayed in your system, this sentiment could be a real handicap.

Let me be clear: Every individual is a unique story. There is no way that someone could “fail” for the rest of their lives in the “kalpa” because they decided to leave a religious organization. Remember that there cannot be a “pure” person if that one forces himself through repression, into living some experience which his own nature does not feel at ease. Evolution of consciousness has nothing to do with will power and force, but rather to let go of the many layers of ego mind.

Will power is a necessary tool in the beginning of our “spiritual career,” but later on; it becomes a hindrance. In other words, baby steps of “improvement” are made through will power. If we take those as the “real deal,” we are still in our “spiritual infancy.”

Dogma/beliefs are just that. They cannot shape the destiny of a person unless this individual is deeply conditioned to accept those beliefs. In fact, dogmas are meant to fall through sooner or later. An example? The “hot” topic nowadays is the existence of UFOs and extraterrestial life. The US Congress is interviewing some former high ranking officers under oath and these individuals appear to agree that aliens from out of space are for real.

How could this affect a dogmatic perception that God has created only one world with intelligent Life or that “the Drama only happens on Earth”? This is a game changer. If aliens exist then a re-writing of dogmatic views will be due in no time, if a religion is to survive.

In my own experience, I have felt the benefit of continuing with meditation time. I do not call it “meditation” but rather “contemplation.” I may share this in another article if there is interest, but however you perceive your connection with divinity, is a good starting point.

Finally it is very important to acknowledge the “real” reason why someone wanted to be a BK, as this “real” reason will come up again and materialize as missing the BK experience. That need remains unfulfilled and that is how many will return to the BK experience.

Celibacy and Sexuality

Sexuality is a mirror of who we ARE. In a violent world, sex will have that violent color at some point. Constant ejaculation will deplete a man’s vitality. While there are techniques to have sex without ejaculating, as our spirituality blossoms by healing wounds and unlearning conditioned patterns, then what is “achieved” through techniques, becomes natural without techniques.

As our consciousness changes, so will be our sexual life. BEING is before DOING.

In my time as a Brahma Kumaris where I “practiced” celibacy for 10 years (that is no sex at all including masturbation,) that experience showed me my own repressions: I could observe that even though externally in my demeanor there was a non-sexual behavior, internally there was an inner fight: Dreams at night insinuating sexuality and even “wet dreams” which at the time I even counted how many episodes I had within a year and that gave me my “baseline” for what I thought was “improvement.” Once every 6 months was “my record” of non-conscious nocturnal ejaculation. Sometimes it was more, depending on what was going on in my Life at that time. As my rejection towards sex and sexuality increased, I could feel that I was a firm BK with a firm hold on celibacy, but I was just beginning my path in the understanding of sexual energies. Prostate inflammation was the price I paid for that lesson at that time.

I didn’t know that inner violence, unhealed traumas, emotional repressions as well as living mostly in the mind; will not allow the easy flow of sexual energy. As the heart center was developed and the acknowledgment of feelings took place, then little by little the repressions staying in the first and second “chakra” started to clear. I observed that as a kid I loved to dance and I was pretty good. However, as an adult in repression mode; my ability to move with fluidity and dance freely ceased to be.

Through this small article I’d like to urge the BK organization to give their followers useful, positive information about sexual energy. In my time as a BK I looked for trusted information as I did not know Bks who were open to speak about their findings and experiences. When sex becomes a taboo, only repression could happen and that is not celibacy at all. The BK literature about “Brahmacharya” (celibacy) may need further revision as the methodology of infusing fear of sex is not the path for a healthy view of human sexuality.

Now, I realize that as we heal emotionally and allow for the heart to have the driving seat of our BEING, then even the “practice” of celibacy changes totally. There are no “wet dreams” anymore, no repressions but there is the acknowledgment of sexuality as an integral part of Life’s expression. At one point that manifestation was only physical, but then as consciousness evolved, there is a need for the emotional component to be there as well. That is why it has been said that the expression of the mind, body and soul (feelings) together in unison, in alignment, are the complete, wholesome action (DOING.) When those 3 are present together through sexuality, we can label that action as “making love.” Many could be self deceived with the terminology, unless they have a clear recognition of what comes from their mind, feelings and emotions. For most this will be the journey of recognition by going from the mind to the heart.

Celibacy means to transcend sexuality in a natural way and not as a repression of it. However, the balancing point between sex and celibacy is for each of us to feel and observe, as everyone is at different stages of our spiritual development.

I am happy to report that my ability to dance and move the hips with fluidity and grace came back again and I welcomed that experience as the father did to his prodigal son.

Different Consciousness

Back in 2012, I was convinced that celibacy was the “path of purity.” I was convinced that there was no other way. The sexual experiences I had before becoming a BK, demonstrated me that sex could be hurtful although, at the same time; there was an uncontrollable drive, an instinctual manifestation which couldn’t be stopped at will. It was pleasurable yes, but with some awareness I could feel the “negative” sides too (depletion of vitality, subtle violence, attachment) and the longing to have the “ultimate sexual experience,” as society sold me that idea through its conditioning.
Brahma Kumaris was a “savior” for me at that time, as I was surely heading into that route of “sex indulgence.”

Superficially, it is easy to blame sex as the culprit. “Sex is sinful, bad, etc.” Now, I realize the issue wasn’t sex per say, but the location of my consciousness and experiences at that time. As we go through the “spiritual” journey, we could observe that consciousness is indeed everything. No wonder “God” said at that time: “Sex-lust is the greatest enemy.” Why? That was needed by me at that conscious level. No more questions. The issue was that I thought that I had “arrived,” when in fact; I was just starting. That was my case.

8 years later: Sex for me is one of the most gratifying experiences that I could have. It is not just pleasure, it is fulfillment. It is regeneration. In 8 years, I am the same person, although; I am not. Different consciousness. For me, Spirituality and Sexuality are intimately related. What are the characteristics of that “new” consciousness? Far less inner and outer violence. A greater capacity for enjoyment. Far less taboos and hangups. That is “more spiritual.”

We may need to experience the extremes to know the middle and once we know it, we cannot say that one side of the rope is “better” or the “truth,” rather than the other; for we understand that the whole experience is necessary. “Spiritual” understanding is not of the mind, but it is in the process of living.

For those only interested in defending philosophies and BK beliefs; I may be the example of someone who had been walking the path of “purity” and…. oh Maya! “She” took me away from the path!

Back in 2003, I was taken from the path of being a “normal” human. My wife at that time, later resented the BK movement because “that took me away from marriage.” My ex-wife had her experience, her point of view and BK followers have a different one. I cannot please everyone and that is not what Life is about. When dealing with contradicting opinions, the main point is to observe our own feelings: When dealing with that issue, what is what I feel? And more important once a personal decision is made: With what kind of care I disengage from one side to go into the other? It is not just about DOING what we think is “right,” but we need to consider those who are with us, those who soon will be part of our past: How do I break the news? How do I prepare the terrain so potential animosity is minimized? That is a mastery in itself, for otherwise; consequences will be felt without a doubt.

At that time, I picked the BK movement over society. Ten years later, I picked Life. Not society again, but Life. Thus, from society, to BK and now into Life. Once we learn about conditioning, we cannot be part of that anymore although, living with all, acknowledging all without rejection.

It is important to look back so we find the “gems of knowledge” through our own experience.
There was a time when society was alright. There was a time when “they” were considered “impure” by me. We can go “pro” OR we can go “con.” That is the path of the mind. We have a belief, an opinion of everything. To understand that our opinions are based on our experiences and those are different from someone else’s, is a teaching that took me awhile to realize. Now is the time when I observe society for it reflects “me,” but there are no movements “pro or con.” Same with the BK world.

What has changed? Consciousness. To allow for Life to change “me,” has been very important in my path. Otherwise, I would be stuck with a philosophy, a point of view and rejecting others. Why reject others? To belong to one, means not to belong to others. We cannot embrace the Totality at that point, and Life is a Totality.

I rejected Brahma Kumaris before becoming a BK and while belonging to society. I took the “7 days course” and dismissed those “crazy beliefs” for about a year; until I had experiences with Brahma Baba, thanks to my sister’s connection with him. That changed my game. That saved me from my pursue of “empty dreams” but ended my marriage as well. Also during those years, the extremes arrived in my Life to complete the “humble” lifestyle look: Went from a Director of Technology into a pool cleaner and massage therapist. The experience was devastating for my ego, but looking back; it was completely necessary. For what? For that who is emerging now. It takes time. Our label of an experience changes according to the color of the glasses we wear. Those glasses are consciousness.

The “price” to pay for what I know now by experience, is not cheap. Nothing is free of charge.
Can I get angry and complain that I could have been someone “important” in Life, if it wasn’t that I decided to go full heart with my spiritual “nonsense”? That is lack of awareness and lack of honesty. I felt that there was something calling me, but I couldn’t put a name to that. It was related with spirituality, with “God,” but then it changed into knowing myself. That was the driving force, the meaning that I was searching and that I couldn’t fulfill by following different paths.

Now, I receive help and guidance from two beings similar to Brahma Baba. I understand that this may not be the reader’s experience; but all I can say is that I did not reject that experience in my path and I have grown through that experience. Life is greater, much greater than any single philosophy or religious view.

I didn’t look for those experiences. Those came to me. Life sent them. If we cling to something, we are no longer learning in Life but we are accepting the route of comfort, the route of perceived security in an ever changing world. To learn and grow in Life, means necessarily to change.

Now I can say that Sex, Brahma Kumaris and Society are all alright; God is also alright and so is Maya.
Let me add the words “in my experience” at the end of that sentence above.
My experience cannot be yours, but perhaps you could recognize some aspects of this writing in your own life.
I am not selling anything to you. I am not sharing any “truth” to you to save yourself or looking to gain your “vote” pro or against something.
I merely write to share my experiences, to share change but perhaps, with a different consciousness every time.

The choice-less path of Awareness

“When you are practicing a method, you have set a direction towards which you are moving. The direction and the end is put together by thought. So you are not out of thought, you are still in the movement of thought. Will is the accentuation and exaggeration of desire. You desire to have enlightenment; you desire moksha, liberation or heaven or whatever you call it; you desire it, and you work for it. You set a direction, and whatever end goal you have set for yourself is still within the area of thought, matter, time and measure. So you have not left thought, you are still caught in it. A mind that is inquiring into meditation is aware of this fact and therefore has no system, no method, no goal, no direction and therefore no will.”
Public Talk 4 in Madras (Chennai), 15 December 1974 – J. Krishnamurti.

The above is not understood by “spiritual people” living in the mind. No will, no system, no direction, no goal… How is that possible?

What is the method to “become like the Father” according to Brahma Kumaris? The answer will depend on who responds. His own experience and beliefs. What is actually what ‘God’ said? Many things… however there is no list of items, no steps to get “there.” No method. It happens. We could believe that it is “my effort” but that idea is coming from the ego mind who wants to be bound in the security of an outline, a set of instructions to believe that it is getting somewhere “special” by DOING things.

Am I saying not to DO anything then, and let for things to happen?
NO. In many articles I have described that OBSERVATION, to be AWARE and conscious of the process is the “true” ACTION, the “true” DOING. But many will say, but “only observation?” There is no awareness of the significance of being AWAKE and conscious of the things that are continually happening around us.
Some energy comes into us, changing our mood. Have we felt the moment that happened? How do we react? Are we observant of our beliefs and our unwillingness to change despite the signals that Life is sending us?

When we are bound by the mind, we only believe in sticking to some old paradigm, to reach something “better” but Life does not work like that.

I read here ( https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2020/01/woman-reports-rape-15-minutes-india-200110032323608.html ) that “one woman reports a rape in India every 15 minutes.” That is amazing coming from a country known to value “peace,” known to practice spiritual “methods” such as celibacy.
Observe that all that sheer repression towards sexuality due to different taboos and ideals is coming to the point where it cannot longer be held under “control.”
What a practice such as “celibacy;” (as it is understood by the majority of people bound by their mind,) is capable of bringing?
Without a doubt further repression. That is why, FEAR is used instead, and that brings as consequence the feeling of guilt and shame. A sinner is born.

The same old “spiritual” paradigm is not enough to measure and fit a changing world.
The same phenomena has been happening with Catholic priests. Child molestation the consequence of such practice in a homosexual environment. But the belief that Jesus did not have sex and I must imitate him is prevalent, although “reality” is different.
Obviously, some ask: What is the solution? They want an answer, a recipe to follow that will fit every case. Those individuals are bound by their own minds. They lack the OBSERVATION to look at themselves and be honest with their own feelings and become aware as to how human sexuality becomes an outlet for aggression and violence however tinted with pleasure. They cannot see that sex for them, is only about satisfying the mind.

These people only want an answer, something that they have to DO or avoid DOING, that is the extent of their OBSERVATION; then Brahma Kumaris offers that: No sex at all. Fight your own demons. Ask help to God. Live in the fear of “failing” and being doomed forever.

Do we see the movement of this? When SEEING it, OBSERVING it, DO we see our path without making a choice? That is no will, no method, no direction.

Brahma Kumaris: The bottom line

There is value in the BK experience. This is without a doubt.
What I value the most is the teaching that I received to rely on myself for my own survival. Cooking, cleanliness, discipline… Those are skills/values I learned through the BK experience.

However, the one teaching which I value the most, is the one which taught me to live alone. For once, I was one of the very few “brothers” out of many “sisters.” That meant a very restricted interaction with females within the BK circle and by extension with the outside world due to the practice of celibacy.

Living by myself was quite a challenge in the beginning. Later on, it became second nature. Then, Life took me out of that shell to find my own balance. We learn and change by going through the full range of the experience.

As far as the belief system, the cycle of time is something which I have experienced to be true. It is true for me. It is my experience.
The rest, has little value to me. Nevertheless, I also need to share what I found to be false:
Sex is not a sin. It is dishonest to reject something that we may feel in our nature. We could observe. Learn from it, but to put a false facade of “purity,” by living in a vacuum to avoid temptations, that is dishonest.
If you add guilt, fear or low self esteem due to feeling sexual, then your are punishing yourself for nothing at all. DOING something is not the factor deciding the value of our level of consciousness. BEING is.

How do I know the above? I have experienced a different range of sexuality, which has been energizing, revitalizing and as a matter of fact, it is a source of well being and spiritual “improvement.” My guides (Beings of light) have helped me through this process. I understand that everyone is not ready for this; but it is completely false to generalize and label sex as “sinful.” That is my point. Sex only reflects who we ARE.

Feeling guilt is a powerful tool used inside many organizations to control the behavior of followers. It is that guilt the one that we need to be careful of. Guilt has killed religious followers. Guilt has trapped followers beyond their wishes. Guilt, is in fact a source of sadistic pleasure for an unbalanced mind.

How is BK predestination related with feeling guilty?
That is a question which need an answer. Hint: Could we feel guilty of our role in a predestined Drama, for whatever that is?
There are actions that we could change despite feeling otherwise, we mask who we are; but what we feel inside, who we ARE, is not changed by denying it and repressing it. That only increases that which we deny.

The BK experience could teach us that repression and rejection only increases the desire of those things which we deny to ourselves.

The importance of Celibacy

Celibacy is a natural consequence of feeling fulfilled in Life. Whenever there is that inner fulfillment, the mind will not go someplace to look for fulfillment.
When someone had a good meal, that person will not feel hungry. Similarly in Life, as we experience and live, the former “needs” will diminish. What we found to be important at one point in our lives, will cease to be at a later time.

Any religious follower who claims to practice celibacy should ask himself:
Do my mind bring sexual desires within me? Do I still feel attraction for someone? Do I unconsciously bring sexuality into my dreams?
If the answer is yes, then that follower is only repressing to comply with the ideal of celibacy.
If we are fully aware of this, then perhaps we will need to OBSERVE the need, acknowledge it and decide for how long I will be living with a repression, knowing that sooner or later, in this Life or the next ones, there will be a consequence to deal with.
The Golden age is not for repressed individuals. I can guarantee that.

Celibacy cannot be “attained” by the use of will power. It will only be repression.

Why is it that pornography or romantic novels is seeked out by many individuals? Because the mind can fantasize with something that it is not part of his experience. In a few words, that which I don’t have, I want and denying that I want that, only increases my repression and my desire to have it. Have we observed that? The opportunities that Life will bring to observe that repression will be plentiful. Nevertheless, a seeker may avoid those scenarios and live a repressed Life for fear of “failing.” That seeker will not be AWARE of that repression.

Why is it that men and women need to be separated in a “spiritual gathering”? Obviously, to try to avoid a collision of attraction between repressed individuals. Physically may be possible, but mentally cannot happen.
I am not saying that this code of conduct is “bad” or “good.” That doesn’t matter. What matters is to OBSERVE if there is repression. That is all.

Sexuality is not the same for everyone. Not everyone is ready for a fulfilled Life through sexuality. Therefore, when dealing with the masses, it is important to make a “yes” or “no” statement, “good or bad” to simplify things, to make it “safe.”

Celibacy is a process. It is not a compulsion. It doesn’t happen because I want it or because I am too old or too sick. If the mind keeps fantasizing and desiring, there is no celibacy at all.

If I “practice” celibacy, it will only be repression.

Knowing that I am repressing, I could accept that and deal with the consequences; but if I am not AWARE of it, then I am wasting the opportunity to learn from my own experiences.

Celibacy is the completion of a fulfilled Life. Sexuality is the means to that completion for those who are ready. For those who are not, sexuality is a mirror. It will only show who they ARE.

Brahmacharya

Celibacy is a “black or white” practice in Brahma Kumaris.
No sex at all, is the belief to practice to make someone more “spiritual,” “elevated,” “pure.”
What I’d like to transmit to Brahma Kumaris readers is that Sex in itself is not ugly, sinful or impure.
What we ARE is what makes sex into those things that the Sakar Murlis constantly speaks about.

This is not something that I have read or that I am repeating from another guru, or another belief coming from another God. This is my own experience.
What we ARE is not depending on a “practice” such as: “I will be compassionate while having sex.” That is a lie to ourselves. What you ARE will express without any rehearsals. It is your consciousness.

Most individuals at this time, are experiencing an inner rebellion towards sexuality. For some, is about liberation from previous rejections and the expression of their hidden desires, although; their energy will be drained. It is about experiencing a few moments of pleasure. That is the extent of sexuality that they will know.

For others, like in Brahma Kumaris is the continuous attempt to go beyond the body. A “yogi” is meant to conquer sexual desires through their own sheer will power and the help of God.
Why?
Because pleasure is not understood but feared and consequences of deep conditionings of centuries of sexual rejection, will take the individual away from the “spiritual realm” by attaching their senses to the physical body. That is the belief.

One important thing that I have learned in this journey, is not to fight with myself. Every energy that is within has a reason to exist. By opposing to its expression, by repressing it, we are only postponing its expression. Believe me, that repressed sexual energy will express. If it is not allowed to, it will kill you.

Of course, then we have the stories of those who have “conquered sex lust.”
How do you know, how do you measure it? If repression means to “conquer,” that is an ugly way to deal with your sexuality. It will bring consequences.

I am not here to tell anyone to engage in sexual activities or to reject them completely. Everyone has their own path, the range of sexuality is vast and it spans from no sex at all to lots of sex, to transcending sex lust, through refining subtle energies (Brahmacharya.) Love is in that realm for some.

My concern is for your health. I just want to say that to be honest with your current state of BEING is the most important aspect.

Transcendence of sexuality does not happen through rejection, will power or any sort of commandment that we wish to follow. It is a natural state, experienced once your time arrives. It is not on your hands to expedite your process. Every experience that we experience in Life, is necessary as it is.

If you look and acknowledge where you ARE rather than what your mind tells you what “should be,” you will have the chance to enjoy the gift of living Life. When you are enjoying, you are spreading good vibrations to everyone. When you are enjoying Life, you are DOING service without any childish desires for Paradise, high status, to make subjects, etc. It is NATURAL service to humanity.
Finally, when you are enjoying Life you are accumulating “good karma.”
Honesty has its benefits, but those benefits will be experienced when we do not “practice” honesty, but when we ARE honest without any practice whatsoever.

For the common good.